I’m a father fighting to my kids back so I must raise $20,000
I’m a father fighting to get my kids back. I moved back to Denver 2 years, 3 months, and 7 days ago. I love Texas, because I learned how to be a man out there. To me, a man is a provider, a lover, and a fighter. A man must be a pillar when there is 0 support. I’m comfortable admitting that I wasn’t this person. Most of those issues were my own mental blocks. For a long time, I knew I needed to walk away from a toxic situation. Unfortunately, I didn’t…mainly because of what I thought of love. That belief cost me so much and has haunted me for well over a year now. I learned a valuable lesson I will cherish for the rest of my life about myself and people.
I’ve spoken about this before, but on Feb. 18, 2017 I was publicly trashed by people I fed and gave shelter to on social media. The reason for the humiliation was out of spite, anger, and bitterness. I was a serial cheater who slept with too many women to count or remember. The cheating didn’t stem from me just wanting a notch in my belt to brag about. The cheating was an extension of feeling inferior, feeling ignored, feeling taken for granted, and feeling like I wasn’t a man.
I was asked to provide a level of stability, loyalty, and consistency that I had never experienced. I was asked to be someone I didn’t know how to be for myself much less another person. My failures caused hardship on my family, but it also caused a lot of frustration and anger.
I was disgusted with myself honestly. I was hurting someone who I once believed loved me, because I didn’t know how to love myself and as much I tried to express this issue, it went ignored.
Frustrating is an understatement. I no longer found any joy in the things I was passionate about. I stopped writing music, I struggled to get out of bed. No matter how much I expressed these issues, it was swept under a rug…until that fateful day where it had to be confronted. The things I had done, had been from over 5 years prior. Before that time I focused on changing my life to be a man she would be proud of. After it happened I was in tears. I popped at least 20 pills and was instituted. I was diagnosed with major depression disorder. Since then I’ve had to deal with death threats, I went under a knife for her safety, and simply focused on doing better. My home, my business, everything was gone, destroyed, or taken from me.
At this point I went from seeing my kids everyday to seeing them once every 2 months. A decision that was made without any choice in the matter. Every time I tried to visit my kids it would lead to an argument involving the same people I had issues with. It got so bad, that I decided I wouldn’t put any more effort forth towards fixing our relationship. As I made the decision I was constantly receiving messages about effort as though it was a one way street.
I didn’t want to fix our relationship and decided co-parenting would be a better solution. She would repeatedly ask me to try to fix us but in the same breath, would laugh and joke with the same people who publicly humiliated and threatened my safety. She saw no issue with it. So I began reaching out to the people who knew what was truly in my heart.
No matter what I did I had to keep seeing my enemies in her messages.
She would defend them over and over. I had discovered she was conversing with the same person who threatened to shoot me. I asked her to drop me off back home as I was at her place, and in my anger I acted completely out of character and spit on her, got out of the car in the middle of the highway and walked away.
My calls became less frequent, I didn’t want to fight with her any longer. All that mattered were my kids. We arranged that I would speak with my kids every night at 9 o’clock. What really came about were ignored calls, and excuses as to why I couldn’t speak to them. I wasn’t allowed to have private conversations with my children and would barely hear from them or see them. That has continued to this day. I’ve never harmed my children in any fashion and realized that they were being weaponized.
She told me she had met someone which to be honest didn’t matter to me. I had cheated and felt like I didn’t have the space to be mad about that. Within a matter of weeks my kids were in front of this person and every time I called it was ignored. After about 7 months of not seeing my children I sent her an e-mail stating that I would ghost parent. I was paying for my children but not hearing from them and seeing them at this point for months prior. From Sep. 23rd to November 12th I went no contact.
When I finally reached out to plan my son’s birthday, I was blocked. We planned 4th of July with my daughter, she shows up several hours late. I try to ignore her and focus on the kids and she picks an argument.
My babies turned 2 and 4 on March 6th and March 18th (my birthday) this year.
I find myself chasing to call my kids constantly. They now wake up to another person and I haven’t seen them in over a year. I discovered today that she is trying to use my depression to file a motion to have supervised visits with my children upon every visitation which was denied. I have never harmed my babies and I take pride in being a great father to my kids. For about a year, I haven’t had a clue where they even live in the event of an emergency. I have been alienated from my kids.
I decided to contact an attorney for father’s rights and discovered that the fee’s are on average run close to $20,000.00. The only option I have now is to stand up for myself. I’m in a position to get my life back again and have worked hard to get back here. Now that I’m in this position, I need my kids.
My kids have been kept away from me for so long that it’s been advised that I get therapy for them so I can re-insert myself into their lives. My family consists of my kids and my fans and I believe that is being exploited.
I haven’t had a depression episode since my divorce ironically enough.
At this point, my music royalties, merch sales, ticket sales etc. will go towards my attorney so I can fight for my kids. I have toddlers and they are being exposed to someone else as though I’ve never been present every day of their lives in an effort to what feels like replace who I am to my children.
Your help and contribution will help me reach my goal so I can fight on even grounds for my kids. She will say that she is not keeping the kids away from me but after finding out she placed a motion to make sure I see my kids less, I see what she is doing now and I am forced to fight back the right way. She will say she isn’t keeping the kids away from me without a drop of accountability. I have been jumping hoops to be with my kids for 2 years now and enough is enough.